Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

#1255 - Helping Your Kids Understand Sex, Puberty & Consent – Featuring Michelle Mitchell

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Episode notes

In this warm and essential conversation, Dr. Justin Coulson sits down with author, educator, and parenting expert Michelle Mitchell to explore how parents can navigate conversations around sex, puberty, consent, and identity with their children aged 8–12. Michelle shares insights from her book Where Do Babies Come From?, offering parents practical tools to talk about tricky topics with clarity, confidence, and compassion.

KEY POINTS:

  • Parents often feel unsure or awkward when kids ask about sex, reproduction, or body changes—but avoiding the topic can lead to misinformation and anxiety.
  • Michelle's book is written for kids aged 8–12 and includes age-appropriate detail, wraparound values, and medical illustrations to provide clarity and context.
  • Talking about sex should include conversations about respect, emotional intimacy, and consent—not just the mechanics.
  • Children benefit from being book “bosses”—given agency and choice about how, when, and with whom to learn this information.
  • Respecting a child’s privacy and emotional readiness is crucial; discomfort is normal and protective.
  • Conversations about consent start with everyday experiences: knocking before entering, asking before touching, and even checking in before offering advice.
  • Identity and family story matter deeply—every child deserves to feel seen and safe, no matter how they came into the world.

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:

“If you don’t ever want that to happen to your body, you don’t have to—because anything to do with sex is 100% your choice.”

—Michelle Mitchell

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:

  1. Start Early: Begin conversations around body parts, privacy, and consent well before puberty.
  2. Choose the Right Resources: Use age-appropriate books like Michelle's to guide your conversations and revisit them often.
  3. Normalise Curiosity: Let your children know it’s okay to ask questions—nothing is off-limits.
  4. Respect Autonomy: Ask if your child wants to read with you or alone; offer space but stay present and open.
  5. Model Consent Daily: Ask permission before touching or offering advice to build mutual respect.

Value Connection Over Perfection: You don’t need to have perfect answers—just be available and genuine.

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