Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

How Do You Tell a Child Someone They Love Is Dying?

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Episode notes

How do you talk to your child about a terminal illness in the family? What if it’s not your family, but your best friend's—and you want to support both their kids and your own? In today’s heart-wrenching episode, Justin and Kylie tackle one of the toughest parenting challenges: helping children navigate the looming death of a loved one. With compassion, honesty, and practical wisdom, they share how to approach these conversations—and how to show up when words aren’t enough.

KEY POINTS:

• Be honest with children in age-appropriate ways—truth helps, secrecy hurts.
• Children need predictability: keep routines and rituals where possible.
• Acknowledge emotions—yours and theirs. Say “I feel sad too.”
• When supporting a grieving friend, show up practically. Don’t ask, just do.
• Teach your child how to be a caring friend: “I don’t know what to say, but I care about you.”
• Offer your home as a safe place for affected children to rest and just be kids.
• Model empathy, presence, and consistency—not just for the family in crisis, but for your child watching.

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:

"I don’t know what to say, but I care about you." — Teach this to your child, and say it yourself. It matters.

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

• Happy Families Website (submit your question here)
• Has Screen Use Crossed the Line in Your Home? - With Brad Marshall

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:

1. Speak to your child about serious illness honestly and age-appropriately.
2. Keep routines and rituals in place to provide stability.
3. Validate and model emotional expression: let your child see that it’s okay to be sad, angry, or confused.
4. Help your child support their friend with care, not pressure.
5. Offer practical help to grieving families—meals, transport, child-minding—without needing to be asked.
6. Let your home be a haven for kids who are carrying heavy emotional loads.

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