Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

#1253 - Teen Girls Explain the Mental Health Gender Gap

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Episode notes

Why are so many girls struggling with anxiety, low mood, and poor mental health—and why are they starting to think it’s normal? In this Doctor’s Desk episode, Dr Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack recent UK research that asked teen girls themselves what's causing their distress. The answers are confronting: gender expectations, academic pressure, toxic friendships, and social media. But there’s hope. This episode offers real parenting solutions to help our girls thrive.

KEY POINTS:

  • Girls are normalising poor mental health. That’s not okay. We need to intervene early with meaningful support and connection.
  • Narrow gender expectations hurt. Whether they lean into “girly” or “tomboy,” girls feel judged either way. Let them follow their authentic interests, not societal labels.
  • Academic pressure is intense. Many girls feel they must succeed and that failing means they’re a failure. That belief is contributing to rising anxiety.
  • Friendships can be fraught. Judgy, competitive peer dynamics—especially around appearance and eating—erode girls’ confidence and mental health.
  • Social media fuels comparison. Girls see everyone else’s “perfect” lives and feel like they don’t measure up. The myth of the perfectable life is everywhere.

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:

“Poor mental health shouldn’t be normal. It should be the exception—not the expectation.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

  • University of Manchester research (linked in show notes)
  • Miss Connection: Why Your Teenage Daughter Hates You, Expects the World, and Needs to Talk – By Dr Justin Coulson
  • Happy Families School Membership

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:

  1. Break the gender box. Support your daughter’s interests, whatever they are. Expose her to a wide range of hobbies and possibilities.
  2. Ease academic pressure. Model balance, share your own stories of failure and recovery, and consider the value of a gap year post-high school.
  3. Prioritise quality friendships. Encourage your child to nurture one or two deep, loyal friendships over being "popular."
  4. Create strong tech boundaries. Monitor screen time, model healthy device use, and ask reflective questions about how social media makes them feel.
  5. Eat dinner together. Regular family time at the table builds belonging, boosts well-being, and keeps the door open for tough conversations.

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