Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

#1261 - Hooked on Games: How to Help Kids Break Free from Addictive Gaming (feat. Scott Novus, former VP at Disney & gaming expert)

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Episode notes

Hooked on Games: How to Help Kids Break Free from Addictive Gaming
(feat. Scott Novus, former VP at Disney & gaming expert)

In this eye-opening episode, Dr. Justin Coulson speaks with former Disney executive and GameTruck founder Scott Novis about the hidden dangers of video games—and how parents can help their kids develop a healthy relationship with gaming. From understanding addictive design to replacing screen time with real-world connection, this conversation delivers practical, real-world solutions for every family navigating the digital age.

KEY POINTS

• Addiction by Design: Some game developers deliberately design games using the "hook algorithm" to exploit children’s brain development and keep them playing compulsively.
• Self-Determination vs. Hooked Gaming: Games built on autonomy, mastery, and relatedness (like Minecraft) build skills and confidence. Hooked games create craving, not satisfaction.
• 3 Hacks for Safer Gaming:
1. Buy the game (don’t use free-to-play).
2. Play offline (limits tracking and manipulation).
3. Listen to how your child talks about the game (progress = good, frustration = red flag).
• Ending Game Time Without Conflict: Pre-agree on ending conditions, give non-verbal cues (like flicking the lights), and offer choices that preserve agency.
• Offline Substitutes Matter: Create "hard to enter, hard to leave" real-life communities (e.g., sports, jiu-jitsu, Dungeons & Dragons) that offer connection, skill-building, and purpose.
• Social Disconnection: Excessive gaming and screen time can cause “virtual autism” and impair emotional and social development.
• The Goal: Return to a play-based childhood that prioritises real-world connection, effort, and fun.

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE

“If your child sounds like a victim when they talk about the game—they’re in trouble. If they sound empowered, they’re probably playing a good game.”
— Scott Novis

RESOURCES MENTIONED

• Books:
• The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt
• Glued to Games by Scott Rigby & Richard Ryan
• Scattered Minds by Dr. Gabor Maté
• Miss Connection by Dr. Justin Coulson
• Websites:
• https://www.scottnovis.com/ – Scott's personal site
• gametruck.com – Scott's company for social gaming experiences
• Article:
• William Siu's essay in The New York Times on game addiction and design

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS

1. Buy Games, Not Addictions
   Choose paid games that don’t rely on manipulating your child’s attention or money.
2. Play Offline Whenever Possible
   Remove always-on connectivity that allows companies to track and shape behaviour.
3. Ask the Right Questions
   Is your child developing skills—or just chasing random rewards? Listen for signs of empowerment or frustration.
4. Negotiate Game Time Up Front
   Pre-agree on stop times and methods, give warnings (e.g., flicking lights), and honour your child’s autonomy.
5. Replace, Don’t Just Remove
   Replace screen time with rich, social, skill-building real-world activities—like sports, martial arts, tabletop games, or outdoor adventures.
6. No Screens in Bedrooms
   Set screen bedtimes. Keep devices out of reach at night to prevent secret play.
7. Get Involved
   Play games with your kids—even if you're bad at them. Model effort, learning, and connection.
8. Watch for Red Flags
   Look for sleep disruption, secretive behaviour, rage quitting, or declining school performance.

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